Monday, January 30, 2006

The Boys get a card

The Boys get a card
Originally uploaded by Michael_L.
From the Indescribable Ms. Lex I got a beautiful birthday card.

The wonderful thing about the card was there was a little bit of action involved in which Daffy Duck blew off all his clothes trying to blow out the candles.

As soon as the boys saw it, Carlos decided that perhaps it was time to blow out Billy's Candle!

Saturday, January 28, 2006

Do you remember......

Where you were 20 years ago today?

Today is the 20th Anniversary of the Challenger Explosion.

It's sort of like for those people who were alive in the early 60's and they remember "where they were when they found out that President Kennedy had been shot?"

I remember (for the Challenger Explosion not the Kennedy Assisnation) that we were sitting in English class and turned the TV on to watch the lift off, I think it was right before lunch and we were "finished" with class so we could watch the shuttle. I remember it was a big production because Christie McAuliffe (the first teacher that would be in space) was on that shuttle and everyone was excited.

It all seemed so surreal at the time, almost like a television "special effect" we couldn't believe what we were watching. I remember that we were looking at each other with a look of "what's going on? Did I see what I really just watched?" There were no screams of anguish, there was no crying, there was just stunned silence.

But really to think that 20 years has passed......

Have you sent your card to the boys yet?

Well look at this, two people already did!

Since two cards came in one week there was utter chaos at the abode! And everyone, and I mean EVERYONE needed to get in on the action.

Especially when the first card showed up from Captain_Howdy_Girl, everyone wanted to be in the picture because it was the first card they'd received

The Boys & Girls were so excited they partied late into the evening. CHG sent me a lovely card to help me start celebrating our Birthdays, amazingly enough our birthdays are on the same day. Amazingly enough, I'm older than she is : -( What you can't tell from the picture is the ears and tummy are a fabulous faux fur (at least I hope it's faux) and there's a great warning on the back that says "very young children should not be left unattended with this product" Those Crazy Canadians!

The next card came from the Most Amazing and Talented Ms. Mac all the way over in Switzerland!

The Queen and her MuscleMan Husband went on a lovely weekend get away several weeks ago, and sent this lovely postcard. The boys were so excited they could hardly keep their hands off of each other, who knows what they'll do if they get another card.

Have you sent yours yet?

The Boys

PO Box 408543

Chicago, IL 60640

Let the experiment begin

Let the experiment begin
Originally uploaded by Michael_L.
So it's official! I'm now a winter blonde!

See what happens on a rainy boring Saturday afternoon? I hope this doesn't happen to you.

But let's see if the saying is true: Do blondes have more fun?

Well bring it on!

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Why does everything have to be a scam.

Last year I decided that I wanted a “good” digital camera, so I went out and bought one. Well I never really used it because it was too big/bulky/didn’t fit in my pocket/always forgot to take it, etc. So it’s been sitting in the box in my cupboard.

So the other day I decided that I would try to sell it. I thought I would go the eBay route since that seems to be the best way, but I didn’t want to deal with the whole shipping process. I figured I was going to lose money on the deal anyway so why use up more money to get rid of it.

Instead I decided to try selling it on Craigslist. Have you been to Craigslist? It’s a very cool “tool” that allows people to basically post classified ads for anything from selling pots and pans to soliciting sex partners to leaving a “just missed” message for that hot chick you saw on the train.

So I took a picture of the camera (with my other camera) and posted it on Craigslist. I got 4 responses, they were all basically the same:

I really want your camera, I’ll pay you by USPS money order and I’ll give you my FedEx account to ship it.

It just “smelled” of scam to me from the very first one. The bad grammar, the bad sentence structure, the I’ll pay you more than you’re asking becos (sic) I really need it (you REALLY need a digital camera that badly?) So I emailed each person back and said that someone else was in line in front of them (which there was) and that if they didn’t want the camera I would then move onto the next one.

Well, each one came back saying “give me your address, I’ll send you a postal order today along with my FedEx account number.” So I ended up pulling the product and not selling it to anyone.

Why does EVERYTHING in this freaking world have to be a scam!

All I wanted to do was sell my digital camera, why is that so tough?

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

What drink are you?

Shamelessly stolen from Canadian-Swiss

You Are a Mai Tai

You aren't a big drinker, but you'll drink if the atmosphere is festive.

And when you're drunk, watch out! You're easily carried away.

New Medicines for 2006

I apologize for the lack of creative and/or funny posts lately but it's that mid-winter crap that we're all going through. Well for those of us in the Northern Hemisphere, those of you in the Southern Hemisphere can go...oh I won't go there, see how bad I am!

The FDA is planning on a approving some new drugs this year and I wanted all of you to be aware of them so that you can keep an eye out on your local drugstore shelves


Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours.

Plant extract that treats mom’s depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to two days.

Suppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn’t wait till they moved out.

Liquid silicone drink for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and prevents conception.

When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting in enjoyment of country music and pickup trucks.

Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.

Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethal lines as, “You make me want to be a better person . Can we get naked now?

Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping Increases potency, duration, and credit limit of spending spree.

Relieves headache caused by a man who can’t remember your birthday, anniversary, phone number, or to lift the toilet seat.

A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers in elevators.

When administered to a boyfriend or husband, provides the same irritation level as nagging him

Crack Tax?

Ok, the folks in Tennessee must really be on Crack.

Apparently last year they instituted a Crack Tax that brought in more than $2.0MM USD last year.

The basis is Drug Dealers are supposed to pay taxes on their wares, somehow they're able to pay their taxes confidentially and they get a stamp......and all of the money goes to help fighting drugs.

But here's the funny part, if someone gets busted for selling drugs and they DON'T have the stamp they get busted for not paying taxes either.

This has got to be the craziest thing I've heard in a long time.


Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Being Thankful











A boy and his frog

There was this little boy about 12 years old walking down the sidewalk dragging a flattened frog on a string behind him. He came up to the doorstep of a house of ill repute and knocked on the door.

When the Madam answered it, she saw the little boy and asked what he wanted. He said, "I want to have sex with one of the women inside. I have the money to buy it, and I'm not leaving until I get it."

The Madam figured, why not, so she told him to come in. Once in, she told him to pick any of the girls he liked.

He asked, "Do any of the girls have any diseases?" Of course the Madam said no. He said, "I heard all the men talking about having to get shots after making love with Amber. THAT'S the girl I want."

Since the little boy was so adamant and had the money to pay for it, the Madam told him to go to the first room on the right. He headed down the hall dragging the squashed frog behind him.

Ten minutes later he came back, still dragging the frog, paid the Madam, and headed out the door. The Madam stopped him and asked, "Why did you pick the only girl in the place with a disease, instead of one of the others?"

He said, "Well, if you must know, tonight when I get home, my parents are going out to a restaurant to eat, leaving me at home with a baby-sitter. After they leave, my baby-sitter will have sex with me because she just happens to be very fond of cute little boys. She will then get the disease that I just caught. When Mom and Dad get back, Dad will take the baby-sitter home. On the way, he'll jump the baby-sitter's bones, and he'll catch the disease. Then when Dad gets home from the baby-sitter's, he and Mom will go to bed and have sex, and Mom will catch it. In the morning when Dad goes to work, the Milkman will deliver the milk, have a quickie with Mom and catch the disease, and HE'S the son-of-a-bitch who ran over my FROG.

Saturday, January 21, 2006

Everyone's Awake

So we got some snow last night, not as much as they had originally anticipated but the ground is covered it's all so pretty.

Well it was pretty until our stupid maintenance man came at 7:35 am on a Saturday morning to use the gas powered snow blower to clean off the sidewalks. I should say that we live in a courtyard building, so ALL of our bedrooms face the courtyard.

Now I can understand the need to clean off the sidewalks and make sure they're clean because you don't want liability issues, but to come out at 7:35 on a Saturday morning and run your loud-ass snow blower for 20 minutes to clean an inch of snow?!?

Believe me you, if the shoe was on the other hand the cops would have been called and knocking on my door if I had bass booming music playing at 7:35 on a Saturday morning disturbing ALL of my neighbors.

Needless to say, I didn't get to sleep in this morning.....bastards!

Friday, January 20, 2006

I'm totally stealing

It must be Friday because I can't think of a thing to write. It's been a busy day so that makes the time go by faster which is great, but other than that not much going on.

We're on the start of a big snow storm, supposed to get 4-7 inches, I mean hey, who hasn't enjoyed 4-7 inches every now and again? Good thing it's on a Friday because I have no plans this weekend. The Boyfriend has "the boy" so the only thing I have planned is to go to the post office box and check it ((hint hint - I hope I don't cry))

But I'm totally stealing this from Clew's Blue's Cranial Racket You should go check her out if she's not on your regular rounds.

Here's the deal, it's not a meme, it's not a tell all your secrets kind of thing it's a way for you to participate in my blog (haven't you been waiting for that all along), here are the rules:

Post a comment with a COMPLETELY MADE UP memory of you and me. It can be anything you want - good or bad - BUT IT HAS TO BE FICTIONAL. Even if you’ve only been here a few times, you're welcome to participate anyway. C’mon, it’ll be fun! When you're finished, feel free to post this little paragraph on your blog and be surprised (or mortified) about what people DON'T ACTUALLY remember about you!

Ok, on your mark, get set.....GO!

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Lost The TV Series

I’m watching the new episode of Lost I can’t believe I’m being such a geek about this show, it’s too funny because I know tomorrow a co-worker and I are going to sit for a half hour and talk through the whole episode…I wonder if I should start taking notes.

It’s really the only show I watch and there’s a commercial on right now.

One thing bugs me, why doesn’t Jack’s hair grow?  They’ve been on the island for 49 days and Sawyer got a hair cut last week and Michael is looking like a wild man but Jack’s hair is perfect.

Any Traffic is Good

Do you use Sitemeter or something similar to check out who’s visiting your blog?

If you aren’t, you should, it’s free and it satisfies the internal voyeur in all of us.

One of the great features of even the basic sitemeter shows you what people searched for that brought them to your site.  Oh those crazy search engines go out and crawl the web all the time, just looking to put your words together in funny combinations.

For example a few that I’ve seen recently:

How much stolen money is a felony which came from MSN and took them to a post about felony child endangerment and donating money to charity…huh?  But who am I to complain, I’m number 4 on the search results, pretty cool!

Here’s a good one:

Naked lady jumps out of cake again from our friends at MSN Search but from the Canadian persuasion and took them to a post about my Blonde Joke and a combination of a Kitty Litter Cake post, what?  I’m number 9 here.

I’m moving up the charts on MSN Search, this one is currently number 2.  

Want to know apparently the advice I’ve been dispensing fulfills MSN search bot need for pointing people when they “want to know”  I wonder what the guy wanted to know?  Did I answer a question for him?  Did I make him ponder his question longer?  I’ll never know because the bastard didn’t bother to leave a comment, but hey I’m number 2!

I must owe people money at MSN Search because they’re the only one sending me any traffic.  I’ve registered with Yahoo and with Google and a few others, but it’s no use.  Here’s another good one from them:

Answer to shine on harvest moon extra credit  I wonder if it was for a take home test?  I wonder if they were “allowed” to use extra materials or was it on the “honor system”  What was up with that?  Did you ever have a teacher do that?  We had one that would do that for quizzes, I guess he figured that he made the damn questions so hard that it would take us most of the night to figure the damn things out!  That was also the year we were learned how to use a slide rule, which was a requirement for physics.  I wonder why I don’t remember anything from that class?!?  Hmm, that’s why!

But I digress, when I pulled up the search, I couldn’t find my blog anywhere, I was up to page 15 and still didn’t see me in fact I got so bored that I actually left the computer and went and did my taxes (hey I’m probably getting a refund)!  And then wondered why I was on the computer, oh yeah that’s right.  So somehow that person got to me… many pages did this person go through to get to me.   Oh I hope I helped them get that extra credit, but then again I’ll never know because the bastard didn’t leave a fucking comment.

Really though if you don’t have a site meter, or if you do have one, I would suggest checking out the free Google Analytics.  It gives you a lot of detail and it’s free.

So leave a comment for those of you that never leave comments.  Everyone wants to meet you!

Oh yeah, and send some fucking postcards to Billy and Carlos!

So what’s your funny search engine results?  I know of a few from Rob and Kat and someone else I read today, but I’m sorry I can’t remember who (sorry).

A Meeting for the Meeting of the Meeting

A week ago, my bosses-boss told one of my co-workers that The Boss (the Pres of the company) was asking about some numbers and she wanted to set up a meeting to talk about it.

Yesterday at 4:00 my co-worker comes in my cube and says "Hey, S just asked me if I had all of that information for her, I didn't realize she wanted it before our meeting."

No big deal, I had been working on it, so we talked for a few minutes on what they were looking for and all was set.

Then this morning we had a meeting to go over the presentation so that we could then go to another meeting with my bosses-boss to talk about the meeting we were going to have with The Pres. Whew!

Then when we're in this meeting she tells us that we'll probably present to the whole Exec Team - uh oh!

So we have another meeting scheduled to get ready for the meeting that we're going to have on the meeting with the wonder I never get any work done!

Monday, January 16, 2006

Doin' The Laundry

Originally uploaded by Michael_L.
So yesterday when I walked into Laundryland I wanted to say:

"Hello, someone left their laundry detergent outside....on the fuckin' sidewalk" But alas there were children there so I bit my tongue.

Actually me being at the Laundry is pretty funny, considering it has been years (and I mean years) since I've done laundry.

Now before you chastise me and call me lazy and spoiled and Bourgeoisie please let me explain......I don't have a washer/dryer in my apartment.

Now there is a laundry room in my building, but it's such a hassle and it's too small (3 washers/dryers) and it's usually survival of the fittest down there, plus I lost the key 2 years ago and I haven't bothered to get a new one......all because of Marilyn.

Marilyn is the lovely lady that works at Laundryland. She's the lady that makes sure the place looks nice, makes sure there are enough quarters and watching over the place, she also will do your laundry for you. She charges me $0.70 a pound to do all of my laundry, from undies to towels to sheets everything.

Normally she charges me between $15-20 for 3 to 4 weeks worth of Laundry, it's totally worth it to me. But....she and her husband are in Cuba visiting his family and won't be returning until February 1st. I was running drastically low on underwear.

Now, I need my underwear. I'm no longer in my 20's where it was "cool" to go commando....and I'm not turning my underwear inside out to make them last longer (ICK)....which meant that in order to get clean underwear, I would have to do it myself.

So I packed up yesterday and went to the Laundry....

Flo had an amazing time and I had a lot of fun too.

So much happened in those two hours, fortunately I was taking notes so stay tuned for some tales from Laundryland!

Doin the Laundry - Part of the Tale

Doin the Laundry
Originally uploaded by Michael_L.
So this lady comes in with a boat load of laundry. When she approached me and stopped there seemed to be a little draft of odor that continued on.

At first I thought it was body odor but then I looked at her quickly and she wasn't dirty, she clean....but she just had an odor about her. I told myself "Hey you're in the laundromat dude, deal with it." And eventually I did.

So as I was reviewing what was going on around me I saw that she had her whole laundry experience laid out for her. She had two J-ello gelatin snacks, a tray of cheese and crackers, carrot cake with cream cheese icing (if you're asking me how I know....let me ask you, what else would you put on carrot cake except cream cheese icing?) She also had a beverage in a to-go cup and hidden behind there was a bag of chips.

Well the chips weren't just any chips...they were light chips. Do you know what's in Light Chips? Olean? Remember Olean from the late 90's. Well check out this link.

Being the bad person that I was, I said to myself "Oh gurl, you know she's got some anal leakage." And that's when it hit me, I knew what the smell was!

Stay tuned for more laundry stories


Originally uploaded by Michael_L.
There's a rainbow everywhere if you look hard enough.

Ever play chicken with a submarine?

A friend sent this to me today, so I thought I would share it with you:

Saturday, January 14, 2006

Why do Shemales have the biggest dicks?

I was surfing through videos on YouTube today and I came across this one:

***NOTE**** Please do not click on this link if you are easily offended, honestly this is NSFW (not safe for work) in the least! Also don't click if children are nearby.


Now I don't condone what's going on in this video, but it's like a train wreck. At first I was going to mark the video as inappropriate, but then the phone rang and it ran for a few minutes. OMG it really is like a train wreck, it is like a 14-car pile up on the other side of the interstate that has traffic backed up for miles.

And that's when it hit me, why do all the shemales have the biggest dicks? What is up with that?!?

I've stopped watching it now, but it's freaky deaky I'll tell you that.

Your Meat Guide

Corned Beef
Here's your Meat Spirit:
Chewy and unctuous, Corned Beef is your spirit guide.

Your comforting tenderness belies the sultry nature that lurks at your core. You are usually served with a side of salty steamed cabbage which tends to cause indigestion and mealy boiled potatoes which sometimes gum up the works. You are not to everyone's taste, but a true connoisseur will appreciate your homey nature. Your life may not be perfect, but your spirit guide will be the best caretaker that it can be.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:

free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 0% on meatiness
Link: The What type of meat are you? Test written by stuckinsc on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Shelley Winters is Dead

Who? Shelley Winters, you knowt he Multi-Oscar Winner. You know, Shelley Winters....oh ok, the fat old lady in the Poseidon Adventure who died. She played Roseanne's Grandmother in the series.....Ah, now you know!

Honestly I thought she had passed away some time ago, so I was shocked to hear this news. She was always one of those people who have always been "old" to me, you know like my Kindergarten Teacher who looked like she was a 125 years old but was really in her late 40's.

She made the Poseidon Adventure in 1972 (when I was three years old) and she was old then (I thought), she had a great career where she was in more than 50 additional features, now that's a prolific actor! Check out her IMDB Link, she was in a lot of stuff.

Here is her Obit

Friday, January 13, 2006

Happy Birthday Sis

Today is my big sisters 12th Anniversary of her 29th Birthday.

She is four years older than me and I remember when we were growing up she turned 13 on Friday the 13th. She had her picture in the paper.

When they came to take her picture she wsa wearing this big courdroy jacket and had her roller skates tossed over her arm. We were BIG into roller skating back then (there wasn't anything else to do) and my parents had arranged a Skating Party at the local rink, whoo hooo a real party! Well her picture was in the paper that Friday and she was an instant celebrity and wouldn't you know it, it snowed! And it snowed....and it snowed.....almost to the point where the party was almost canceled. But we persevered and drove through that blinding blizzard to the rink and skated around in circles for hours, and we were happy about it!

I called my big sis today to wish her a happy day and we were talking about the whole Friday the 13th thing and she said, "I even think it's a full moon tonight, how cool is that?" I looked it up on the internet and it's actually tomorrow (what a bummer) but she was really bummed about it. I didn't think anything about it really. We had a little chat and since I was at work had to run but wished her a happy day.

So what brought this on you ask? Well I was reading over at Xmichra's blog about the history of the number 13 and Friday the 13th, it's interesting reading go on over. What got me was her last statement there are 13 witches in a coven and it hit me:

My sister really is a witch!

No really, I love my sister

Happy Birthday Sis!

Dancing In The Backseat

I got a new "toy" camera last week so I was playing with it while we were on our way to the movies to see Cheaper By The Dozen II.

We were chillin' and dancin'

Kitty Litter Cake - Update

Well we just finished our "pot luck" and all I can say is I heard an awful lot of:

"Oh that is so gross looking, but tastes so yummy"

I'll post a few pictures when I get home tonight, but I think it was a hit. Everyone was grossed out but intrigued just the same!

I would highly suggest making this for your next family function!

Here's a link to the recipe: LINK

The Kitty Litter Kake was REALLY a hit, as much as everyone was grossed out they were even more so intrigued by it. Of all the desserts (and there were a lot) it was the one most eaten in fact we took it back up to our cube area and everyone grazed throughout the afternoon. About 4:15 I cleaned up to get ready to go home and I dumped everything in the trash, not two minutes later I hear someone come walking down and ask where the dessert is....I offered it out of the trash (a la Seinfeld) but they didn't accept.

Here are some questions I was asked:

Q: Was that a new pan? A: Yes it was only used once before this.

Q: Are these tootsie rolls? A: Yes, all of them except one.

The best comment was from someone who had picked up one of the "turds" and said "I just can't eat this, I don't know why?" and then proceeded to place a napkin gingerly over the plate to hide it.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Kitty Litter Cake

It's the Finish that counts
Originally uploaded by Michael_L.
We're having an after holiday Pot Luck at work tomorrow.

I was trying to figure out what to make and I thought that since this is the year of the purge I would do something completely different.

Click on the picture to look at the steps required to put together this masterpiece of grossness.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006


As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde following behind him jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. The trucker lowers the window, and she says "Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load." The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street.

When the truck stops for another red light, the girl catches up again.
She jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks on the door. Again, the trucker lowers the window. As if they've never spoken, the blonde says brightly, "Hi my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"

Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street.

At the third red light, the same thing happens again. All out of breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the truck door. The trucker rolls down the window. Again she says "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"

When the light turns green the trucker revs up and races to the next light.

When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets out of the truck, and runs back to the blonde. He knocks on her window, and after she lowers it, he says..

"Hi, my name is Kevin, it's winter in Pennsylvania and I'm driving the SALT TRUCK!"

***NOTE**** If you live in a tropical locale this joke may not make any sense to you. For those that live North you'll totally get it. Also, I'm not picking on Blondes, I just thought this was a great joke. In fact if you scroll down, you'll see a picture of me as a blonde.

Michael as a blonde

Michael as a blonde
Originally uploaded by Michael_L.
Here's what I looked like (5 years ago) when I was a blonde.

I've been a blonde more recently....well not in the last two years so I apologize that this is the most current I have.

Monday, January 09, 2006

Kitty Litter Cake

We're having an after holiday "pot luck" at work on Friday.

I was going to make a Kitty Litter Cake as a gag (literally).

Has anyone ever made one of these? Any special things I should be aware of? Anything to make it "over the top"?

New Tattoo

Inspired by CaptainHowdyGirl I've been thinking about getting another tattoo.

I have a small tattoo on my chest and I've also got a pierced nipple, but I've been thinking about a new one for a few years now.

I haven't been able to decide to what to get? I don't want a tribal band, I don't want ass antlers but I'd like something topical.

I've got a few ideas:

1) I always thought it would be cute to have a little cow/goat right below my beltline, eating some grass.

2) I've been thinking more about getting my zodiac, but I'm not sure where. I'm thinking either on my left front hip or maybe on my left arm.

Here are some I've been thinking about, which one do you like and where should I get it?





Click the pic for a clear view


Birthday Time is Coming

I know SO MANY AQUARIANS it's outrageous.

It truly is the Age of Aquarius!

Several years ago I bought a sturdy perpetual calendar (one that only has the number days of the month) and started keeping track of my friends birthday's. I'm looking at my calendar right now and I have a total of 26 Aquarian birthday's coming up, oh wait - 27 including mine!
That includes 2 new Internet friends (one of whom is a day before mine and one who's is the same day as mine. I also know 4 other people that share the same day as me, I know more Aquarians than any other zodiac sign, isn't that just weird?
I got a phone call from a very good friend of mine the other day to tell me that they were having a big birthday party in Atlanta, the weekend of the 17th. When I lived in Atlanta there was a group of 9 of us who all had birthdays from the last week in January through the end of February. Well this year, one of the guys in the group is turning 50 and one of the guys is turning 30 so they're having a big party to mark the special occasions (in case you were wondering I'm not 30 and I'm not 50).
The Boyfriend and I were just talking about going back to Atlanta to visit so we took our tickets from Labor Day (when we were supposed to go to New Orleans for Southern Decadance but the hurricane came instead) got them to take us to Atlanta instead. We can't think of a better reason to see our friends and to party in Atlanta than to help celebrate a whole bunch of birthdays.

White Tea Does Not Equal Herbal Tea

I decided to get “off coffee” for a while.  Every work morning I brew a fresh pot of Decaf Coffee, fill up my trusty thermos and take to the office with me.

That way when I’m doing my morning reports I can leisurely sip a delicious cup of coffee with the creamer flavor of the week.

I only drink “regular” coffee on the weekends because it really wires me out, when I’m sitting in the office the last thing I want is to be nervous and jittery with nothing to do but look at my computer screen.

This weekend while I was at my local grocery store perusing all of the amazing teas, I specifically was looking for herb teas, because sometimes regular tea contains more caffeine than coffee (go figure).  The store was pushing (i.e. had a sale) on White Tea, I’d never heard of White Tea before so I thought I’d buy some.  I figured (incorrectly I might add) that White Tea was the same as Herbal Tea, and as we all know, Herbal Tea doesn’t have caffeine.

So I bought a box of White Tea with Blueberry, how yummy is this going to be, I thought.

So this morning I brewed up a pot of tea, filled my thermos (minus the flavored creamer) and off to work I went.

Well let’s just say about an hour after I drank it I felt really funny.  I was trying to figure out why I felt “buzzed” when I realized it had to have been the tea!

So I did me a google and what do I find out?  White Tea does have caffeine, albeit not as much as regular tea, thank goodness or else I would have been royally f*&ked.

Just imagine the fun I had when I went to our staff meeting and I was all hopped up on Caffeine, I was talking a mile a minute and didn’t want to stay in that seat.

Moral of the story: just because it’s white tea doesn’t mean it’s herbal tea.

Here’s an interesting link about White Tea

Saturday, January 07, 2006

Who said I didn't like girls or What's In My Mouth

Who said I didn't like girls
Originally uploaded by Michael_L.
I've been asked this question many times so I figured I should post the "big" version of the photo that is in my comments.

Last year for my birthday friends made me a Barbie Birthday Cake, the kind where you stick Barbie in the top and the cake is her dress.

Well, you've seen it here first.

This is a picture of me eating Barbie!

Saturday Trip To The Post Office

Well I'm off to the Post Office to check the Box......I wonder what I'll find?


What I found was a Post Office Box that had not yet been "opened" by the post office.

Ugh! When I went to get the PO Box it was during the Holiday Rush so I stood in line for 30 minutes (I didn't care, I had nothing else to do and I had my tunes). Then the next day I get a phone call from the lady saying that she forgot to get my driver's license information, so I had to go back again.

Then today I go in to make sure that it wasn't brimming over with cards and what do I see? I see a masking tape X along the back of the box, the same as it was the first day I got the key.

I walk over to the window and talk with the lady (the same lady actually) and ask her what that means. She cocks her head and says "That means it's closed" I was waiting for her to snap and throw her head to the side.

"Uhm, I just got this a few weeks ago, with you...remember....." her tune changes "Oh yeah, baby....well let me see give me your ID"

Well come to find out she tells me that it was a mistake but the "lady" said I hadn't recieved anything anyway.

Ok, this PO has about a thousand boxes, how can the lady remember one little box and whether I got a post card or not?

So, if you sent me a postcard I haven't received it yet....I'm so sorry.....but I'm glad that I got this fixed before the big plan starts going.

Friday, January 06, 2006

Church...did someone say the "C" word?

You bet they did along with the Lego word.

Check this out

You'll be amazed!

Best Blonde Joke Ever

I've heard some funny blonde jokes in my day, but this by in far is the funniest JOKE

Happy Friday

Hope you're having a Happy Friday.

Here's a cool game, I can't explain it just go do it.

**UPDATE*** On a Friday night what am I doing but sitting here playing this stupid game. I got to level 16, how high did you get?

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Tag - You may be it

I've been Tagged by the Fantabulous Robin who was tagged by Nickle Annie (which means I can't tag her, damn it!)

So here it goes, but first go visit the other folks listed at the top, admit it we're all traffic whores!

Remove the blog in the top spot from the following list and bump everyone up one place. Then add your blog to the bottom slot.

1. Sarah and the Goon Squad
2. Little Miss Pissy Pants
3. Nickle Annie
4. Smiling through the cracks
5. What’s a Boy To Do

Then you get to select five people to pass the love on to.

I choose:

1. Andi - A Ropey Old Bird in Ohio
2. Ms. Mac's Meanderings
3. The World According to Rob Damnit!
4. Xmichra's Haunt
5. HP Sauce - Captain Howdy Girl

What were you doing 10 years ago?
10 years ago Michael was a young naif who at the rip age of 26 felt as though he were a world traveler (even though he had never been out of the country yet) and had everything in the world at his feet (well almost). He was living in Atlanta, GA and as of that time had not become disilliosioned with how hot it is down there. 10 years have passed and he has become a world traveler and still thinks that everything in the world is at his feet. The journey of a thousand steps begins with just one step.

Five snacks you enjoy:
1. ice cream
2. sour candy (any kind)
3. popcorn
4. cheesecake
5. ritz crackers

Five songs you know all the lyrics to (Oh my, I’m such a queen)
1. Memory from Cat’s
2. Dance 10 Looks 3 from ‘A Chorus Line’
3. My Hump by the Black Eyed Peas
4. Any Abba Song
5. The soundtrack from Wicked

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:
1. Set up my friends with trust funds so they could enjoy life
2. Set foot on every continent
3. Have a home in London, Rome and South America
4. Open a restaurant
5. Create a film production company

Five bad habits:
1. I’m a very aggressive driver
2. Not reading as much as I should
3. Watching too much TV
4. Not eating properly
5. Picking my nose (ha ha gotcha)

Five things you like doing:
1. Taking photographs
2. Living in Chicago
3. Quiet time alone
4. Time with friends
5. Creating “movies”

5 favorite toys:
1. My camcorder
2. My digital camera
3. My computer
4. My Boyfriend
5. My iPod

Even I Know This Is Wrong

Apparently two young boys were left alone to fend for themselves over the New Year's Holiday while their father and stepmother flew off to Las Vegas to celebrate the new year.

The 9-year old boy was told to take care of his autistic 5-year old brother before the adults (they don't deserve to be called parents) took their new christmas puppies to his mother's (the boys Grandmother) to watch while they snuck off to Las Vegas to bring in the new year.

Now I'm not a parent, and I don't profess to be one, but that is just wrong. Obviously the Grandmother lives close enough that they could drop the puppies off, but why didn't they drop the kids off too?

Sometimes I really wonder what thought process people have going on in their heads where they can justify this? It just doesn't make sense at all to me, this is just wrong on so many levels.

Well the good news is, the adults may be charged with Felony child endangerment which carries a maximum sentence of 6 years.

I think the best line in the whole article is:
- Calero and De La Vega have requested lawyers and have refused to talk to police.

Well of course they have, I would love to be able to follow this story and see what comes of it, see what plausible excuse these two lame people could come up with to justify why they did what they did (and there is no justification in my book).

I say "Book 'em Dan-o and give them the 6 years."

Here's the story LINK

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

It's how you look at a situation

As you may have heard there was a terrible mining incident here a few days where 13 miners were trapped and eventually 12 of them died.

Initial news reports came that said 12 miners had been found alive but shortly after it was corrected that 12 miners were found dead and one survived.

I agree, this is a terrible tragedy but how is it that if 12 miners were found alive it was God's Miracle, but if 12 miners were found dead it was God's Will?!? How can you have it both ways?

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Which is your favorite Candy Bar?

It's time to do a candy survey again.

Remember the Jolly Rancher Experiment? Here are the Results from that very scientific poll.

What Is Your Favorite Candy Bar
3 Musketeers
Milky Way
Hershey Bar
Almond Joy
Peanut Butter Twix
100 Grand
Baby Ruth

Brokeback Mountain

The Boyfriend and I went to see Brokeback Mountain on Monday.

I'm not going to review the movie because there are hundreds, if not thousands of reviews out there already.

What surprised me was that it was only playing in a few theaters here in Chicago and when we arrived at the theater (we caught the 12:30 show) it was mostly women and middle-aged couples. Yes there were several gay boys there (us included) but we were in the minority.

The movie was cinematically beautiful, the vistas, the mountains, the scenery but it was slow. So slow that I really wanted to close my eyes and take a nap (remember the last time I took a nap was during Capote - but I wasn't feeling well then, this time I was at full speed). Also, I wish that Heath Ledger would spit whatever was in his mouth out and annuciate his words, I swear he mumbled throughout the entire film it was distracting.

I thought that Ang Lee's visual representation was amazing but the story was sort of lacking. I guess coming out at a young age (21) I wasn't filled with angst over doing something that I knew I couldn't do.

What did I take away from this movie? Do what makes you happy!

All I will say is - go see it if it's playing in your town. We were glad we saw it, not excited that we saw it, just glad.

***SPOILER*** Ok, I'm a big baby and I cry at movies, but towards the end when Heath goes to Jake's parents house and finds the shirt....this guy that was sitting behind us was sobbing....not crying...but sobbing with all of the chest heaves and everything. Apparently it touched something within her but I thought it was funny (I giggled to myself). I know I'm going to hell....

Happy Anniversary Rover Spirit

Two years ago today, the rover Spirit touched down on the Mars surface, with one goal in mind - was there water.

It's twin-Opportunity, landed 3 weeks later and they are both still going.

Originally they were planned to "stay alive" for 3 months, it's been two years!

Way to go Spirit and Opportunity, keep up the good work. Just about the time you're ready to retire you'll be glad to know that the US Government will not have any social security left for you, but what will you care you're millions of miles away.

Here's a link to the story if you'd like to investigate further.

Monday, January 02, 2006

What is she gonna look like

060102 new tattoo
Originally uploaded by
When she's 70 years old and a Grandmother.

I can just see all of her grandkids running around saying " us your Ass Antler us....."

Sunday, January 01, 2006

Happy New Year

Originally uploaded by mlehet.
Here is hoping you have a healthy, wealthy and wise 2006!