Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Any Traffic is Good

Do you use Sitemeter or something similar to check out who’s visiting your blog?

If you aren’t, you should, it’s free and it satisfies the internal voyeur in all of us.

One of the great features of even the basic sitemeter shows you what people searched for that brought them to your site.  Oh those crazy search engines go out and crawl the web all the time, just looking to put your words together in funny combinations.

For example a few that I’ve seen recently:

How much stolen money is a felony which came from MSN and took them to a post about felony child endangerment and donating money to charity…huh?  But who am I to complain, I’m number 4 on the search results, pretty cool!

Here’s a good one:

Naked lady jumps out of cake again from our friends at MSN Search but from the Canadian persuasion and took them to a post about my Blonde Joke and a combination of a Kitty Litter Cake post, what?  I’m number 9 here.

I’m moving up the charts on MSN Search, this one is currently number 2.  

Want to know apparently the advice I’ve been dispensing fulfills MSN search bot need for pointing people when they “want to know”  I wonder what the guy wanted to know?  Did I answer a question for him?  Did I make him ponder his question longer?  I’ll never know because the bastard didn’t bother to leave a comment, but hey I’m number 2!

I must owe people money at MSN Search because they’re the only one sending me any traffic.  I’ve registered with Yahoo and with Google and a few others, but it’s no use.  Here’s another good one from them:

Answer to shine on harvest moon extra credit  I wonder if it was for a take home test?  I wonder if they were “allowed” to use extra materials or was it on the “honor system”  What was up with that?  Did you ever have a teacher do that?  We had one that would do that for quizzes, I guess he figured that he made the damn questions so hard that it would take us most of the night to figure the damn things out!  That was also the year we were learned how to use a slide rule, which was a requirement for physics.  I wonder why I don’t remember anything from that class?!?  Hmm, that’s why!

But I digress, when I pulled up the search, I couldn’t find my blog anywhere, I was up to page 15 and still didn’t see me in fact I got so bored that I actually left the computer and went and did my taxes (hey I’m probably getting a refund)!  And then wondered why I was on the computer, oh yeah that’s right.  So somehow that person got to me… many pages did this person go through to get to me.   Oh I hope I helped them get that extra credit, but then again I’ll never know because the bastard didn’t leave a fucking comment.

Really though if you don’t have a site meter, or if you do have one, I would suggest checking out the free Google Analytics.  It gives you a lot of detail and it’s free.

So leave a comment for those of you that never leave comments.  Everyone wants to meet you!

Oh yeah, and send some fucking postcards to Billy and Carlos!

So what’s your funny search engine results?  I know of a few from Rob and Kat and someone else I read today, but I’m sorry I can’t remember who (sorry).


Kat said...

Did you get my postcard yet? I sent it like a week ago! (Ok, maybe just a few days ago.)

xmichra said...

I use site meter, and it helps me to know if anyone i don't ant reading my

If you type in xmichra, all you get is me baby. Hence the move.

I was linked to 'anal glaucoma cartoon' because of the comment that was a joke.

staff memeber calls in sick and says they have annal glaucoma.

Boss says, what? what is that?

Staff member says, I just don't see my ass coming into work today.

Expat Traveler said...

I'm not so sure all traffic is good traffic. I prefer to make spammers take a hike and don't particularly. Sorry no strange searches today, maybe better luck next time.

Anonymous said...

I get the straight log files from my webserver, so I don't need to use a tool like site meter. I just run the logs through an analysis program and it gives me all the stats and search string results. said...

That last comment was mine, I wasn't logged in.

captain_howdy_girl said...

On my old blog I kept getting people who searched for "drinks her own pee" which brought them top a post about my weird little dog.

CanadianSwiss said...

Remember, I've been blogging for not even 2 months! Here's the funniest I got - gay expat permit switzerland (Google)

Michael - Are you planning to move to Switzerland?? ;-)

Michael said...

CSwiss - I can't live in Switzerland it costs too much for bras and panties! LOL!

Rob7534 said...

The search results that lead Internet folk to my blog are all because I can't SPELL :)

HA! And neither can they!