Saturday, March 25, 2006

Toilet Humor

So the other day I was in the john at the office….no I was not getting a john I was going to the john….or as some people say “the head” I never got that can someone explain it to me?  I’m sure there have got to be some straight boys that read this.

So the other day I was in the john at the office using the urinal (I know hard to believe I was standing up to pee) when someone walked in and went directly to one of the stalls.  As I’m standing there finishing my business I hear him grab some toilet paper, while he’s still standing (since I can see the feet facing the toilet) and I figure he’s gonna blow his nose (which always grosses me out for some reason) so I’m preparing myself for a sneeze when all of I a sudden he flushes the toilet instead…no sneeze?

Oh, he wiped off the toilet seat – he’s one of those cautious boys – by this time I’m done using the facilities and zipper up as he takes out one of those “tissue paper seat covers that always end up sticking to your bare ass.”  As I’m washing my hands I hear him take out another one, a second one?  And then a THIRD one?  Three?  What is this guy doing hoarding seat covers?  

As I’m drying my hands and walking out of the bathroom I give a quick glance back to the stall and he’s still facing the toilet?!?  With three toilet seat covers being used somehow.  I mean come one those holes aren’t that big so he must have had them perfectly lined up…I didn’t hear him ripping anything so he wasn’t modifying them.

It sorta freaked me out, I wanted to stay and see what would happen next but then I remembered that old quote from science class about observing something “something blah blah blah when you observe something blah blah blah you change the outcome just by observing it blah blah blah” you know the one I’m talking about.  I figured that he wasn’t gonna drop trou while I was still in there so I skedaddled out of there and started writing this!

I can understand people having some weird bathroom fetishes but this one was really out there….anyone want to confess to having something similar?


GammaGoblin said...

I’m sure there have got to be some straight boys that read this.

I'm straight and I visit regularly :) I don't have a clue what "the head" is all about though.

Two posts about toilets in quick succession, man youre getting obsessed! :)

Michael said...

I know Gamma I was thinking that as well.....honest I'm not!

ProfessorGQ said...

that dude is waaaay weird...I still don't understand what he was trying to do.

CanadianSwiss said...

I dunno, Michael, but he is veeery strange.

Kat said...

I think "the head" may orginally have been a military term. Navy? I'm guessing. Damn, now I have to go google, it's bugging me.

I don't have any weird bathroom habits. I'm totally normal.

Kat said...

The "head" aboard a Navy ship is the bathroom. The term comes from the days of sailing ships when the place for the crew to relieve themselves was all the way forward on either side of the bowsprit, the integral part of the hull to which the figurehead was fastened.

I was right! woohoo! damn, i'm a geek.

Michael said...

Yeah KAT!!! Thank you for solving that riddle : -) You get to move to the next level.