Thursday, May 01, 2008

The Big Gay Marathon is Finished

I am happy to announce that I have completed all of the necessary tasks required to renew my Gay Card for another five years! I was getting a little worried for a bit because I was afraid that I would not be able to complete all of the CE Units by the Deadline. Fortunately TBGM was just what I needed and in the end I prevailed and came out of it with Gay Pride Flags raised and blowing in the wind.

Yeah, who knew that you had to renew your Gay Card every five years? I didn't and was just as surprised when I got my renewal notice in the mail.

Fortunately earlier in the week I had earned enough credits to complete my Showtune Badge by see two shows in two nights! In fact that badge had the gold star on it for Extra Credit.

Saturday night I earned the Comedy Badge by going to see Margaret Cho at the fabulous historic Chicago Theater. Any gay that's any gay was there, as we stood on the balcony like Evita overlooking the entrance it was a sea of homo's everywhere. Homo's and fag hags, EVERYWHERE! If the right-wing conspirators wanted to get id of a bunch of homo's that would have been the place to target on Saturday night.

Maggie (as I call her now) was funny. Not as funny as she's been in the past, but still funny. Fortunately they had a big projection screen behind her so even from our nose-bleed inducing seats we were able to see all of her priceless facial expressions (sometimes they were funnier than the jokes).

She talked an awful lot about vagina's....really an awful long time....

One of the funniest things she said was that she liked hanging out the The Bears because she knew she was going to eat. Hanging out with the Twinks all they want to do is drink and do lines - she's hungry!

After the concert we headed out to The North End (a venerable Gay Bar which is the farthest north on the Gay Strip) where my friend tried to get me to do Karaoke. I decided that I did not need to Gay Chorus Badge this time around. I told him that I don't sing in front of people, I just video tape myself singing to other people's songs and post them on the internet. You have to draw the line somewhere!

I had 3 whole days between the Maggie Cho Show and my last event in TBGM - and boy did I need them.

Tuesday Night I earned enough credits to get my Economical Entertainment Badge. My Best Friend's Boyfriend introduced us all to Yelle and we were excited to pay a whole $15 for tickets to see her only Chicago appearance. I was decked out in my most favorite Forever 21 outfit in hopes that I would mix in with the crowd of Hipsters that were attending the show. Let's just say, I still stuck out!

You can tell you're getting old when you go to a concert and they have 3 acts before the main act, and the main act isn't scheduled to be on stage until 10:30 and you're typically in bed by 9:30! I stuck it out as the DJ set before the concert was great, there was a band that played (the DJ was better) and finally Yelle arrived at 10:30. You can also tell you're getting old when everyone around you is screaming and you're sitting there giving the polite Opera Clap to show your appreciation for her only being 30 minutes late.

The show was in an old music hall, so no seats, just a big open room. When Yelle took the stage we were towards the front and center - pretty good standing spots. Suddenly everyone started jumping up and down in sync as they were dancing to her french raps that I didn't understand, and you could feel the floor moving up and down. That's when you realize you're old and say "Holy crap, I'm gonna move over to the side of the floor here so I'm not in the middle of the collapse when it happens."

Overall though, the concert was good, it was worth the $15, that's for sure, and it helped me get my final CE Requirement for my Gay Card.

Now I'm just waiting to get my laminated card in the mail!


Andi said...

Oh Michael.....

You ARE old. But as I was reading about people jumping up and down on the floor I was thinking "Michael, move to the side in case it collapses" so I guess we're in this together.....

The old club that is.

Michael said...

Andi - You're right, age is good because those silly kids will be the first ones to fall through the floor!

Ice John's World said...

Busy busy Michael! All thos marathon concert events just prove that you are not old. You can still party!