Sunday, April 15, 2018

Why I hate Ina Garten

Ok, hate is a very very strong word, I don't hate Ina Garten, I don't even know her, I just don't like her.

I've long referred to her as the Hyacinth Bucket of the Food Network, and I could never quite figure out why I didn't like her.

I like everybody, ask my bff, that's the first thing he says about me, but The Barefoot Contessa just rubbed me the wrong way, it's not that she always says "Oh, well who knew?" (Uhm, I knew) or "Oh that's everyone's favorite" (Uhm, that's disgusting), it's something more than that.

Today, I was watching her and I figured it out - she doesn't scrape!  She NEVER scrapes anything, not a measuring cup, not a bowl, not a spoon - NOTHING.......EVER!!!

FFS lady there's at least one less cookie or a bit more batter in that bowl because you don't take the high falutin' time to scrape your bowl.  She just figures the intern, or perhaps Jeffrey, will come behind her and clean up after her, what does she care.

As a baker, I scrape the fuck out of everything.....that melted butter bowl from the microwave - scrape, melted some chocolate - scrape, you just need one more cookie for a sandwich - SCRAPE THAT FUCKER till you're peeling off shards of stainless steel!

Watch Martha, that bitch scrapes, she don't throw nothing away....nothin!!!

And I guess that's why I hatewatch Ms Garten, she does have some nice recipes, she just made a honey bourbon cake that looks delicious but if I ever made it I would have to hide my resources.....just sayin'...and she never scraped a fucking thing, bitch!

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